sailorzeo: (Default)

I'm still slacking in the exercise dept.  I don't know why I'm finding it so hard to get motivated this month.  I like going to Curves, I like the people there, but I just can't drag myself there in the mornings before work.  I think part of it is the state of the house.  There is SO much work that needs to be done here, I find it hard to justify carving out an hour for the workout (15 minutes there, 30 minutes workout, 15 minutes home).  If I had all day to work on the housecleaning, maybe it would be easier to get out to Curves, but when I'm trying to get a boatload of work done from 6-1, before leaving for my 2-10pm shift....well, taking care of myself tends to hit the bottom of the priority list.

Throw in that I'm sick, AGAIN (throat this time, little to no voice), and I just don't have the energy and motivation to do what I need to do.  Have you ever tried to work retail when you can only speak in a whisper?  Especially when a large chunk of your clientele are retirees who can't hear you when you speak in a normal tone of voice??

My wonderful coworker is trying to get ahold of the dept. manager to see if he can cover my shift tonight, in exchange for being off Friday.  I haven't heard back from her, so I don't know if she succeeded.

sailorzeo: (guhh matt)
(beats head on table, HARD)

Okay. So the check came today. $120 from my savings. It was SUPPOSED to be $50 for gas and inspection for Matt's Jeep, $20 for TracFone card, $5-$10 for a pair of Keds so I can start going to the gym again, $20 for cat food and litter, and whatever was left for basic necessities like milk, eggs, etc.

Instead, Matt comes home from his one-day contract job and says, "I miscalculated." We made 2 purchases for a total of $7 that threw us into overdraft. Spent $7, racked up $70 in fees. So now that $120 is going towards fees and the overdue inspection on the Jeep. He's going to try to get one of the fees refunded, since it was on a NINETY-EIGHT CENT PURCHASE. Wachovia's been really good with their fees, usually managing to get us SOMETHING back when Matt calls. I mean, there was one time where we were $300 overdrawn, and $250 of it was fees, and they managed to refund us $70, even though it wasn't their fault at all. Maybe it's because we're nice when we call. We know it's not their fault, that it's not "OMG the bank is totally trying to rip us off!"

[ profile] penprp works customer service for a major national bank, so I get to hear her horror stories. I used to work at a catalogue call center, so I have my own. Matt did sales and tech support for a national ISP. The stories he has! We know the operator is just there trying to pay bills. It's not their fault we screwed up.

But seriously, though. Is there any checking account out there that, like, doesn't charge an overdraft fee if the amount overdrafted is, say, under $10? I know there's that new Washington Mutual account out there that's supposed to be changing all the rules, but right now, I can't remember if that's one of them. But I also don't think there's a WaMu around here. Mostly Wachovia, Bank of America, and BB&T (which we actually did a big job for at OMax, and we were trying to figure out what it stood for. I liked my coworker's suggestion of "Bob's Bank and Trust").

And from now on, I don't care how much someone raves about a particular cold rememdy, if it has a cough suppressant in it, I am staying FAR away from it. Cough suppressants make me feel WORSE than I did before I took anything! Makes me light-headed and nauseated.

ETA: We got both fees back, so Jeep has gas, cats have food and litter, and I have nose spray. Tomorrow I will have shoes (around $3 on clearance at Target) and TracFone card. Jeep failed inspection; left turn signal is broken in the front. :-P So he has 30 days to get it fixed.


Jul. 20th, 2006 05:45 am
sailorzeo: (it's on)
Since Tuesday night, the left half of my head has been congested. Bleargh. Sudafed isn't making a dent. It's making it hard to sleep, because 1) I like to sleep on my left, 2) it HURTS, and 3) it HURTS!!!! I tried sleeping on my right side, and that worked from 1 am to 4 am, but now it's aching again. I have one of those neck chiller things, the tubes filled with the powder that turns to gel when you get it wet, that you're supposed to soak in cold water and wear around your neck to keep you cool on hot days. Instead, I soaked it in hot/warm water, and am pressing it to my face for heat therapy. Trouble is, it doesn't hold warmth as well as cold. :-P

I'm hoping the mail comes quickly today, and has the check from the savings account in it, so I can go look for meds that might work better at breaking up the blockage. My dad said it sounded like I had a nasal polyp. Joy and rapture, yet another "wonderful" thing I inherited from his side of the family along with allergies, PCOS, and bad eyesight. He suggested nasal spray, with tilting the head back to let it work in around whatever's in there. It's what he has to do with his Nasonex to get it in around the polyps. Unfortunately, all I have at the moment is non-medicated saline spray, which I'd hoped would maybe flush out the sinus enough to let me breath. No go. At the moment, I'm even willing to try a neti pot. My aunt says it works well for her sinuses. I'm still hesitant at the idea of pouring about a cup of warm salt water up my nose.

If my face is still aching at 7:30, I'm not going to work. I can't concentrate on my work or customers when I feel like this. I told Matt, "I know, you went to work all last week when you were feeling crappy, but I just don't have your work ethic." He said he also didn't have to deal with customers or be seriously focused on what he was doing, so I don't think he'll have an issue with it.

The one thing I really hate about having to call off sick is when Matt says, "It's up to you," in that tone of voice that makes you feel like, "Well, SHIT, now I CAN'T call off!" Sometimes, I'd like him to just say, "Poor thing, yeah, there's no way you can work today." But seeing as the man still goes to work at a job he hates and works a full eight-to-ten hours when he has the flu and a raging fever (sometimes I really hate him), I feel guilty for calling off work for something like rampaging sinus congestion and pain, especially since I LIKE my job.

My heat-thing is cold. Time to go recharge it. I wonder if I can microwave it....

ETA: Yes, I can nuke it. 20 seconds gets it nice and toasty warm again. Also, I called off sick. Matt was supportive, given how little sleep I got. And TheraFlu, at first, tastes like warm lemonade, but as it cools, it tastes like a lemon candle. Bleaaahhhh.
sailorzeo: (bath relax)
Wowee. Holy cow. I think I just experienced a combination of heat stroke and dehydration.

I was bored and wanted to kill some time, so I drew a hot bath. Got my customary glass of ice water with it, and soaked for a while. Matt joined me partway through, and when I felt the headache start to throb, I yanked the drain. Got it set up to rinse off, and felt the room spin. I sort of stumbled out of the tub, grabbed the towel, and my legs just folded, right next to the toilet, which was a good thing, because I felt like I was going to throw up.

I just sat there for a while until it passed and I could trust my legs again.

I think the combination of hot weather and hot bath was a bad one. Add in that I'm taking a diuretic and not drinking NEARLY enough water, and yeah, that could be enough to make me pass out. Or throw up. Or both.

So yes, I have a nice glass of ice water next to me now, and I'm going to have several more tonight.


Feb. 25th, 2006 05:14 pm
sailorzeo: (busy)
Still sick. But on a note that's both positive and negative, I'm not on the work schedule again until Wednesday. I should be feeling normalish again by then. That's the positive part. The negative part is that I only have 17 hours next week. Rob told me Ben's been cutting a lot of hours. We just haven't had the sales to back up 30+ hours for all of us.

So, I guess the next few days are going to be my version of detox: lots of water, try to cut down the massive amounts of carbs I've been ingesting, and try to get my body working the way it should. I finally got my test strip order (took about a week to arrive; I'm not one for patience when it comes to shopping), so I can start monitoring my blood sugar again. It was a fasting 78, and a 2-hour-post-meal 100, both of which fall into my doctor's guidelines for good. Good to know, especially since my meal before the 2-hour testing was pretty much noodles. :-P I've been trying to mix the regular pasta with whole-wheat pasta, since straight ww pasta tasted sort of nasty, but mixed with the regular, I can handle it.

Something else odd: I can't seem to taste garlic too much anymore. I made a little bit of sauce yesterday for my spaghetti: can of tomato sauce, half-can of tomato paste, olive oil, onion powder, oregano, basil, rosemary, fresh black pepper and a heaping tablespoon of minced garlic. I could taste the black pepper when I bit into a not-quite-ground peppercorn, but I didn't really taste the garlic as a stand-alone flavor. Matt had the last bite of my spaghetti (hee, husband or human garbage disposal?), and that was his first comment, the overload of garlic. I just looked at him like, "Really? I didn't taste any." Salt's the same way. I was eating Ritz crackers the other day and they didn't taste like I remembered. I even tried eating them salted-side down, and nothing. Now, I can maybe understand developing a high garlic tolerance. I love garlic and always have. But I've been cutting my salt WAY back for years and years and years. I rarely add extra salt to my food, and I tend to forget about adding salt to sauces and whatnot when cooking (still use it when baking, though, because it's a necessary player). So the fact that I'm not tasting salt worries me. Matt thinks it could just be because I'm sick. Taste buds are screwy. I'm just gonna hope that's what it is.
sailorzeo: (sick)
It's Friday night. That means waiting around for Matt to leave for his overnight shift. Usually, it also means vegging on the couch for a few eps of CSI on Spike, but the 8 pm ep is Committed, which I don't really care for. A few too many squick elements for me. So, it's bopping around on the computer trying to find something to kill time until 9 when the next ep starts.

On the plus side for today, I finished off So High School, my Sara/Nick fluffy fic. On the minus side, every time I've eaten, I've felt sick. I got so tired of the nausea yesterday I actually made myself throw up to see if it would help. It didn't, but it did reinforce the fact that I could never be a bulimic. I'm tempted to do it again, though. There's actually something in my stomach this time.

I'm also somewhat morose. My bonus finally came in, but it was combined on the same check as my pay, and they took out almost my entire paycheck in taxes. I was really hoping that check would be over $1000, but it was just barely over $800. (sighs in frustration) I don't know how we're going to make this work. I'm so tired of scraping by. It's better now than it was when just Matt was working, but not by much. We still pay about half the bills late. Part of that is timing; all the big bills are due in the first five days of the month, and oddly enough, those five days always seem to fall between paychecks. We'd planned to save $500 of my bonus to cover the trip in April, but since that seems to be my entire paycheck this week, I don't know what's going to happen. Matt needs to schedule his tests for school and get those certifications so he can start looking for a better job.

I'm just so tired, and sick, and nauseated, and stressed out. I just want things to get better. I want the cats to stop peeing all over the damn place so the apartment doesn't stink. I want to not feel like I'm going to throw up every time I see, smell or think about food. I want to not get dizzy when I stand up. I want to be able to afford to go to the doctor when I feel like this. I want to get through an 8-hour shift at work without freaking out. I want a lot, I guess. And I feel like it's never going to happen.


Feb. 23rd, 2006 09:04 pm
sailorzeo: (sick)
One of the worst parts of being sick is playing that DELIGHTFUL game of chance, "Gas, Solid, or Liquid?" And that's as much as I'm going to elaborate.
sailorzeo: (guhh matt)
I hate being woken up by heartburn. Especially at 3 am when I have to be up at 6:30 am to go to work. It means that even if I get out of bed and take a Pepcid Complete, I'm not going to fall back asleep. It means I'm going to be cranky and pissy all day at work, short-tempered and snappy.

And I still feel like I'm going to puke every time I smell or think about food. I don't want to go to work today. And the stupid cat wants to come back in through the door even though the window he went out of is still open! (headdesk)

I feel like a balloon. A grumpy, tired balloon that just wants to deflate.


Feb. 21st, 2006 12:23 am
sailorzeo: (sick)
I had to pass up extra hours at work today (Monday) and called off for tomorrow (Tuesday). I feel drunk. Or at least medicated. And I'm not. I had a slight (very slight) fever on Sunday, but today, all day, I felt dizzy, and random scents made me queasy. Bleargh. And now I have an occasional prickle on the right side of my throat.

sailorzeo: (meadow face)
I already know the answer to that. I'm pretty sure the answer is yes, and not in a good way.

Today, Matt and I were going to meeting at the Kingdom Hall. I was more or less fine until we stepped out the door to go. Then I started getting anxious, and the closer we got to the Hall, the worse I got. In the parking lot, I couldn't even make myself open the car door. I was paralyzed with fear at the thought of going inside that building. I couldn't do it. I was almost in tears because I was terrified of going inside the Hall. Matt said it was okay, that I could stay in the car. He left the keys. Not even five minutes after he went inside, I had to get away from the building. Climbed over the center console into the driver's seat and tore out of there, coming home.

I'm still shaky and queasy. I know nothing in there will hurt me, that the people there care about me and are concerned about me, but I just could NOT go inside today. It felt so totally wrong today.

They just redecorated, and I'm wondering if that's part of the problem. The Hall doesn't look the same. It feels colder now, with the beige paint instead of the pink/maroon wallpaper.

When I get insurance again (grr on the switching jobs and having to wait three months), I need to see a psychiatrist or a psychologust, someone who can figure out what is wrong with my head and make it better. I don't like living life feeling like River Tam.


Oct. 24th, 2005 04:29 pm
sailorzeo: (Default)
I'm still sick.
I work 7 am to 3 pm every day til Thursday.

On the up side, I might get to go to Sweet Tomatoes with Matt on Saturday. :)


Oct. 22nd, 2005 12:07 pm
sailorzeo: (meadow face)
I'm sick. Sick enough that I had to call in sick on my second day at work. Bleargh. Rotten timing. I had a wicked sore throat when I went in for the paperwork, and in the 8 hours I was there yesterday, used half a box of tissues and an entire bag of cough drops. Now I think I'm going to go take another shot of that Tylenol severe cold and flu formula and get conked out for six hours. Maybe I'll feel better when I wake.

Even though I'm not thrilled to be working again, I still want to give the job my all. Calling in sick on the second day is not a great start, but I couldn't help it. Rather I stay home one day than hack up a lung there and get everyone else sick.


Sep. 12th, 2005 09:55 am
sailorzeo: (meadow face)
Last night was not a fun night. In addition to the up-at-1-am, we can add in not falling asleep until somewhere between five-thirty and six am, and a lovely rush to the bathroom to vomit around 4. And not quite making it in time, so an early-morning bathroom cleaning session was in there, too.

So, ugh. I don't like throwing up. I don't like being sick. I hope I adjust to the metformin soon.

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