Stuff and bother
Jul. 12th, 2007 06:40 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sailorzeoI did not get my hair cut or anything yesterday. We paid bills, and it just wasn't in the budget. What I wanted to have done would run close to, if not over, $100. At that salon with that stylist, anyway. It's just too much to pay for too much frivolousness.
I may look into Great Clips or Fantastic Sam's or some other chain place, to see if their prices are more reasonable.
See, what really concerns me is upkeep. If I get the haircut I _want_, if I get the coloring I _want,_ then I'm going to have to KEEP going back for touchups. This isn't necessarily a one-time charge. And that bothers me, because I don't want to have to budget a large chunk of money every month for something as stupid as hair.
I knew I wasn't going to be able to afford the hair appointment, but I showed up anyway, to at least know how MUCH I wouldn't be able to afford it. Forty dollars for a haircut. FORTY. I almost started crying. Yeah, I can't afford a "real" salon.
And BTW, I have colored my own hair in the past, in case anyone was thinking about suggesting it. Several years in college. It's messy and time consuming and never what I want.
I think I'm just going to have to accept that I'm not meant for anything resembling style. Long with bangs, long without bangs. That's all I can handle. I can't be stylish, I can't be pretty, I can't be girly. I WILL NEVER BE THE PRETTY, STYLISH DAUGHTER MY MOTHER HAS ALWAYS WANTED. I will always be the ugly one in the corner, the nerd, the joke, the "I-double-dog-dare-you" one. I will always be the collector of hair appliances and products, never the user of said items.
I hate my hair, I hate my image, I hate my situation, and somedays, I really truly hate myself. And on days like today, I think I should try to get in to my doctor to seriously talk about antidepressants.
I may look into Great Clips or Fantastic Sam's or some other chain place, to see if their prices are more reasonable.
See, what really concerns me is upkeep. If I get the haircut I _want_, if I get the coloring I _want,_ then I'm going to have to KEEP going back for touchups. This isn't necessarily a one-time charge. And that bothers me, because I don't want to have to budget a large chunk of money every month for something as stupid as hair.
I knew I wasn't going to be able to afford the hair appointment, but I showed up anyway, to at least know how MUCH I wouldn't be able to afford it. Forty dollars for a haircut. FORTY. I almost started crying. Yeah, I can't afford a "real" salon.
And BTW, I have colored my own hair in the past, in case anyone was thinking about suggesting it. Several years in college. It's messy and time consuming and never what I want.
I think I'm just going to have to accept that I'm not meant for anything resembling style. Long with bangs, long without bangs. That's all I can handle. I can't be stylish, I can't be pretty, I can't be girly. I WILL NEVER BE THE PRETTY, STYLISH DAUGHTER MY MOTHER HAS ALWAYS WANTED. I will always be the ugly one in the corner, the nerd, the joke, the "I-double-dog-dare-you" one. I will always be the collector of hair appliances and products, never the user of said items.
I hate my hair, I hate my image, I hate my situation, and somedays, I really truly hate myself. And on days like today, I think I should try to get in to my doctor to seriously talk about antidepressants.
